A history of Bob.
A smile you can trust.
Greetings citizens! This bulletin has been provided by the graceful hands of the Bureau of Enlightenment and approved by the vigilant members of the Combine Civil Authority.
At the bureau, we recognize knowledge to be the forefront of importance in the blooming modern age! Ignorance is a pitfall that shall entrap and ensnare small minds that seek comfort in dark, lonely corners. As a result, we are starting a new bulletin series, dedicated to the raw collection, and distribution of various facts of this brave new world!
Of course, there is much to discuss when dealing with such topics. The whole world, having now arisen from a once seemingly infinite slumber, is now bustling with activity, far and wide! So, for our first entry, we decided to start somewhere close to home. Somewhere familiar. With something you can trust.
We, of course, refer to the treasured celebrity mascot…
Bob!
Despite being a staple of modern culture of City 24, whether through the popular radio show featuring his likeness, or the various drinks and sodas that the common populace can satiate their thirst with, our good friend Bob was not always so prestigious.
When our world was first aggrandized with the infinite potential of the Universal Union, the possibilities were endless. But, some may argue, the struggles seemed to be the same; unfurling before mankind like a rug of despair. After all, such was a time mankind was limited to instinct alone. Fear being a chief remnant of our old ways of thinking. The poison of our old ‘masters’ was still shocking our senses and driving our very thoughts, begging us to strike and lash out against the very beings that had come to save us! Indeed, much of the old worlds corruption was in dire need of removal, to be torn out from the garden of Earth, like the weed it was. With this process, inevitably came hardship and for some, comfort was in short supply.
That was until the Bureau of Enlightenment was established, in the year of 2004. One of the very first enacted submissions into our darling society, was the creation of the world-famous radio network "The weekly Bobcasts", dependent upon the restored electrical infrastructure, brought to us by the Combine; with a great many improvements we might add. Thanks to their efforts, this single broadcast was able to slowly spread across the wide world, reaching millions and millions of distraught and confused people, still reeling from the newfound liberty of our newfound lives.
Though, you would hardly need to be reminded, it was hosted by Bob Kleinhaus. A man of eloquent speech, proper posture, and of course, his world famous, ear to ear, beaming smile. Truly, he was a man of comfort and levity in a time of great and wonderful change. The channel operated and expanded, with his world-famous graphic, designed by Chuck Goodman, first appearing in May of 2006! However, as you all know, the talented host, respected in life for his grand attitude, and honest depiction of our new world, was brutally murdered by vile anti-citizens during a relatively minor group of insurgents in Asia, July 17th, 2006.
Despite this, he is immortalized in spirit through the recognizable face and likeness of what has come to be Bob! A fitting outcome for the enlightened; promised immortality!
In the years since Bob has become a part of many aspects of civilian life. Whether the age old radio show, still hosted by a variety of loveable personalities, a familiar face while travelling to parts unknown, a multitude of recreational products, or the ‘Soda Bob’ beverage line, which first entered production in 2009.
A smile you can trust.
Greetings citizens! This bulletin has been provided by the graceful hands of the Bureau of Enlightenment and approved by the vigilant members of the Combine Civil Authority.
At the bureau, we recognize knowledge to be the forefront of importance in the blooming modern age! Ignorance is a pitfall that shall entrap and ensnare small minds that seek comfort in dark, lonely corners. As a result, we are starting a new bulletin series, dedicated to the raw collection, and distribution of various facts of this brave new world!
Of course, there is much to discuss when dealing with such topics. The whole world, having now arisen from a once seemingly infinite slumber, is now bustling with activity, far and wide! So, for our first entry, we decided to start somewhere close to home. Somewhere familiar. With something you can trust.
We, of course, refer to the treasured celebrity mascot…
Bob!
Despite being a staple of modern culture of City 24, whether through the popular radio show featuring his likeness, or the various drinks and sodas that the common populace can satiate their thirst with, our good friend Bob was not always so prestigious.
When our world was first aggrandized with the infinite potential of the Universal Union, the possibilities were endless. But, some may argue, the struggles seemed to be the same; unfurling before mankind like a rug of despair. After all, such was a time mankind was limited to instinct alone. Fear being a chief remnant of our old ways of thinking. The poison of our old ‘masters’ was still shocking our senses and driving our very thoughts, begging us to strike and lash out against the very beings that had come to save us! Indeed, much of the old worlds corruption was in dire need of removal, to be torn out from the garden of Earth, like the weed it was. With this process, inevitably came hardship and for some, comfort was in short supply.
That was until the Bureau of Enlightenment was established, in the year of 2004. One of the very first enacted submissions into our darling society, was the creation of the world-famous radio network "The weekly Bobcasts", dependent upon the restored electrical infrastructure, brought to us by the Combine; with a great many improvements we might add. Thanks to their efforts, this single broadcast was able to slowly spread across the wide world, reaching millions and millions of distraught and confused people, still reeling from the newfound liberty of our newfound lives.
Though, you would hardly need to be reminded, it was hosted by Bob Kleinhaus. A man of eloquent speech, proper posture, and of course, his world famous, ear to ear, beaming smile. Truly, he was a man of comfort and levity in a time of great and wonderful change. The channel operated and expanded, with his world-famous graphic, designed by Chuck Goodman, first appearing in May of 2006! However, as you all know, the talented host, respected in life for his grand attitude, and honest depiction of our new world, was brutally murdered by vile anti-citizens during a relatively minor group of insurgents in Asia, July 17th, 2006.
Despite this, he is immortalized in spirit through the recognizable face and likeness of what has come to be Bob! A fitting outcome for the enlightened; promised immortality!
In the years since Bob has become a part of many aspects of civilian life. Whether the age old radio show, still hosted by a variety of loveable personalities, a familiar face while travelling to parts unknown, a multitude of recreational products, or the ‘Soda Bob’ beverage line, which first entered production in 2009.
Drink | Color | Description |
Soda Bob | Blue | The Original! A unique, tasty flavor. |
Soda Bob Fizz | Green | Lemon, lime, sublime. Has the 'zing!' you're looking for! |
Soda Bob Surprise | Red | A rather strong cherry soda. A mouth filling flavor! |
Soda Bob Grape | Purple | A smooth grape flavor. Perfect for relaxing. |
Soda Bob Energy | Aqua | Sleep is for the lazy citizen! Get up! Get going! Get energized! |
Soda Bob Dark | Black. Labelled. | The beer for the civilized citizen. Collaborator approved! |
Soda Bob Brawn | Black. Labelled "CP". | For our valiant men and women in the Civil Protection only! Our gift to them! |
Soda bob became a very rapid preference amongst civilians of all walks of life. A tasty treat amongst the banquet of nutritious sustenance around every City corner. Made from real ingredients and with the backing of Combine Civil Authority themselves, this drink is truly, amongst the finest of civil perks. Distributed only in metropolitan areas deemed worthy and socio-stable. So, if you are reading, but unable to enjoy the variety of enriched flavors, loaded with all kinds of carbohydrates and caloric glory, perhaps it's time to ponder on what more you could be doing to secure your home, and bring it ever closer to the fold. The beating heart of the Combine empire; Earth.
Remember, the benefits of civil behavior and societal stability are endless. Not only for you, but for any friends or relatives you wish to see prosper in this life, and beyond.
Although brief, this has been a short history provided by the bureau of Enlightenment of a dear friend you all know and love. Next bulletin will be tackling something far more exotic. The consequences of human led scientific endeavors. Remember, in spite of our potential genius, we pale in comparison to the wisdom of our benefactors. Find out why, next time!
-Be advised, Soda Bob comes in the following flavors-
Soda Bob
Soda Bob Grape
Soda Bob Fizz
Soda Bob Surprise
Soda Bob Energy
Soda Bob Dark
-Soda Bob Brawn is not authorized for citizen consumption or possession. Consumption or possession of such is in violation of Civil Protection title codes. Civil prosecution may follow-
This bulletin is the property of The Bureau of Enlightenment. Defacement, unlawful disposal, unlawful trade, unlawful tinkering, altering of documentation, unauthorized copies, or redistribution are subject to civil prosecution, at the discretion of local and regional protection teams.
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