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- Oct 24, 2018
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- #1
Dalingo Notty
Balustrade Notty (Mother, left) and Dalingo Notty (right)
Name: So, like, my name is Dalingoooooooooo? Dalingo Notty, and that name, is like, totally not a betchy name, okay? Like, do you even know what a betchy name is, like, because I know of like, you knooooooooooow? Whatever.
Gender: OOOOOH MY GOOOOOURD? Like, totally, like uh muh gourd? Like, I’m totally a woman, like, I’m soooooo, like, you know? Like, yeah? So, like, you know Bethany, right? Like, Bethany, she’s a total betch, and I was like “Are you a woman, Bethany?” Aaaand she was like “WHOAW, HONEY?!?” And I was like “BETCH?”
Age: Totally super young, like, megaaaaaaaaa? But not that young, like, you know like, like?
Date of birth: So I was like born, like, you know? I was like, my mother told me like “Oh heeeeeey! And I was like, “Do you even like bread?” And she was like “TOTALLY!” And from there I was totally into it, you know? Like, I like bread, it’s like so good, but not Hollie’s bread, she’s a total betch.
Place of birth: Like, toooooootally a bit north, you know?
Nationality: UUUUUUH MUH GOOOOOURD! Like, I’m totally from, like, what? Like, you know, like the states or something? Like, you knooooooooooooooooooow, like, It was totally nice there and like, you know the beaches? I was like “whoaw!”.
Spoken languages: Uh, are you insulting me, betch? Like, whoaw. So rude right now, like, I’m sooooooo, like, offended or something?
Sexual orientation: SUUUUUUH, I was like, totally shopping and I was like, can I even buy this? And the store person was like, “Uh,yeah, TOTALLY?” And I was like, TOTALLY! So I totally bought that beauty, and I was like “this shirt is great!”
Religious beliefs: “LOL”
Affiliation: Dave’s bread store
Alignment: Betch
Appearance: Suuuuuuuh, I totally wear, like, you knoooow, the latest fashion? Totally, like, you can’t even SEE me in anything but, like, totally nice stuff, you know? Because, like, yeah, and I was like “gourd, this is nice!” And then I was like, uh muh gourd!
Personality: I once fell down a building, like, it was totally super high up, like, so high up like Bethany’s stoooooooore? And I was like “Whoaw this is, like, super high uuup?” Totally fell down that building, but I was like, ok with it, like? You know, like, it was ok? That reminds me, you been to Dave’s bread store, like, it’s SUUUUUUUH nice there, Dave’s an ok guy, like, he’s like, you know, one of the good ones, you know? He’s like totally like, I was totally “WHOAW! Hello Daaaave? “And he was like, oooh hey Notty!” We’re totally best friends.
Medical records: Except Bethrice though, nobody likes Bethrice, she’s a total betch, like, I once went with her to the store, totally betch slapped her face, like, I was like “UH MUH GOURD? YOU AIN’T NO GONNA WEAR THAAAAAAT?” And she was like “WHOAW, LIKE, HOW DARE YOU LIKE, TOTALLY OFFENDED?” And I was like “Betch?”
Character voice: My voice? Like, I totally sound like the best receptionist evurrrrrr? Like, I sell the best mega hot beverages? Whenever someone steps inside the lobby I’m like “Uhm, helloooo?* Would you like some mega hot beverageeeeees?”
Attire: I totally told you about this one already, betch, like, I’m always totally wearing the latest, best, like, receptionist clothing, like because I’m the best receptioniiiiiiiist? Anywaaaaay I totally have a brotheeeeeer? His name is Billy, and one day I was tuhtally like “FECK UFF BILLY” And he totally did, I never saw him again, what a betch.
Background: Okay, so, like I grew up, like, totally gathered up with tons if sisteeeeers? Like, they were all betches, but I totally love them, because like you know like, I was like? You know like, heeeeeeeeeeeeey sisters? And they were like, heeeeeeey sister! Totally best people, like we were all best friends, shopping all day every day? Anywaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! I was totally on a mountain at a top, with a lot of like, you knooow? Monks or whatevurrrrrr? They were like “Hallelujah, or stuff?” And I was like “LOL” And then I was like totally being nice and stuff to them, and like, you know, like, and another sister of mine was theeeeeere? Her name was Gertrude Notty, and she was like a TUUUUUUTHTAL boring betch. Anywaaaaaaaaaay, they tuhtally kicked me off that mountain, and I was soon after picked up for a 10 season tv reality shooooooooooow! It was named “KEEPING UP WITH DALINGO NOTTY” Anywaaay, long story short, someone died on the show okaaaaaay? Like it was TUHTALLY sister Gertude Notty, but like, they said “You are charged for murdurrrrrrrr?” And I was like “Betch?” Anywaaaaaay, then all this happened so I got away, because like you know like, I was totally not guilty? IT JUST HAPPENED, LIKE, SHE JUST BURST AFLAME, AND I TOTTALLY DIDN’T DO IT, BECAUSE, LIKE I WAS JUST HELPING AND SHE JUST “POFF” FIRE, AND I WAS LIKE “WHOAW!”
Family:
Balustrade Notty & Garsanov Elthador - Mother and father - They were a pair of infamous serial killers that slaughtered the entire population of a small town. They were gunned down by the police in a ferocious battle.
Sister Gertude Notty - Sister - Dead. The official story is, her sister apparently attempted to sacrifice her in a ritual, claiming the following as the reason “SHE WAS A BORING BETCH!”.
Elaine Notty - Sister - Deceased. Last seen with High Priest Daniel.
Billy - Brother - Unknown, presumed impaled.
Beatrice Notty - Sister - Alive, location unknown.
John - Uncle - Deceased. He worked in a box factory from age 18-64, died lonely and alone. No one cared. On his last day he went on a slaughtering rampage.
High Priest Daniel - Grandfather - Banished to the top of a snowy mountain, sworn to a sacred order of righteous flagellation. Not much else is known about him, Notty stayed with him during the younger part of her life whilst both parents were off to "work".
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