I'm Innocent

[Ryan GearPermer]

Disclaimer:

This is my honest view and an open forum to defend myself after being removed and having my reputation tarnished without due process. For the sake of fairness and quorum, I ask that you don’t immediately bloodhunt or shitpost without hearing my side of the story.

After 3 days of personally investigating my removal, I’ve found that there’s more to this situation than it initially seemed.​

---

Hey there,

I’m Ryan GearPermer, one of the people who was removed in Rad-X’s purge that involved a metagaming discord being exposed and its members banned. I’m going to tell you truthfully, I wasn’t a part of it nor was I complicit in their doings as no evidence was provided after my own inquiry into my removal.

I’ve spoken to numerous individuals, such as people I regularly interact with on the server and the same people who were banned to get the full picture. Supposedly, after speaking with Tuki, Stanford, and Elsida, they name dropped me in their discord for one of their plans that I have no knowledge of, making it look like I was one of the core members in their conspiracy, that is not the case.

The real reason I was one of the targets of the leak is because it’s quite stupid, it started with Muho being upset about his props being removed. I’ve told the GMs that his extensive amount of propping was consuming a lot of edicts and needed my dupe (blacksite) to be placed down to include multiple RP scenes that affect the span of the server’s main and subplots. Tuki was the person who handled the spawning of my blacksite because he is a GM of one of my sessions I scheduled on the server, and he had to go around and trim Muho’s propping to get the dupe to be spawned in. I’m told by the same banned people and other people in staff that Muho had a breakdown response because his unused props were being touched. The image below supports Muho being upset, revealing his revenge/retaliation against the people who removed his props and myself included.

​

On top of that, I was preparing the Combine to eradicate the Rot and OOCly sought out permission from the GMs to plan multiple missions to get rid of it. Yes, my character (Brentley Soltermann) was also ICly tasked by the CCA and SRI to combat the Rot and put an end to its infestation (not to mention, the Rot was attacking everyone). Multiple teams of CPs were sent off to destroy levels of infestation created by the Rot, of course, this involved the removal of Muho’s propping during the missions.

That’s why I was targeted in Muho’s leak. Like I said before, a screenshot taken from the metagame discord included my name on a list of goals that the group wanted to accomplish and I have no knowledge of this.

With that in mind, I’m disappointed in Rad-X, Cengiz, and other members of the staff and community who weren’t there to defend me but misconstrued me like a felon and tossed me aside after their discovery with the real problemmakers. I’ve been a part of Willard since 2020 and invested much of my contribution for other players’ enjoyment. Only one person had seen through the bullshit and compelled me to make this post to give clarity to the community and the chance to save my image before misinformation and hate rewrites the narrative.

For the people I’ve spoken to get insight in my wrongful removal, thank you. To the people who ghosted and viewed me a part of the metagame group without giving a chance to speak my mind, I hope you don’t do the same to your own friends.

I’m innocent and have been collateral damage from Rad-X’s purge. No real evidence has been presented and none of the staff involved in the investigation have approached me to determine whether I was actually involved. From the looks of it, I’ve been deemed guilty by association and it all started with Muho’s propping for the Rot Infestation. Don’t get me wrong, the propping was impressive, but it was consuming a lot of edicts, and we needed room for other dupes to be spawned in.

After being betrayed by peers I once considered friends, I’ll likely take a break and move on. However, I hope the server council will make amends if they still value integrity.

Thank you for hearing my side of the story.

TL;DR: My name being dropped in the metagamers discord got me stripped of everything from OWF - that’s 2 years of my efforts being thrown down the drain. On top of that, I complained about Muho heavily affecting the edict count, which made me one of the targets of his leak.

 

[Tsunami]

Ryan, you are one of the best roleplayers I've ever met. When I was told about your departure, I couldn't even believe my ears.

I don't know what is even going on, I don't even have the full facts on the whole thing, but whatever happens man, for you to come here and create a forum post, regarding your innocence, tells me that you do care about this place and still want to engage with it.

Keep in mind, I have to go off my personal experience here. And man, you are absolutely cinema. I hope from the bottom of my heart that you weren't cheating and that the council gives you at least a fair and thorough look at exactly what happened, to determine if your involvement was malicious or not.

I truly wish you the best of luck with all this. I know it's got to be frustrating having to sit out of something you love. Whatever happens man, I wish you the best.

You're a good guy and I think you just got caught up with some bad apples.

 

[Lord Beckett]

Knowing Radx, I'm sure you were removed in an understandable bout of justified anger. Now that tempers have cooled, I'm hoping the server staff will do the right thing and reinstate Ryan, given the fact that he was removed in what appears to be a situation of collateral damage. Just because he was DMing Tuki over GM matters doesn't make him a metagamer. As far as I can tell, his communications were entirely within the bounds of server rules and relating to inquiries that only a gamemaster could answer (in this case, that was unfortunately Tuki). As one of the finer writers I've seen in the Willard community, it would be a shame to remove Ryan over simply being guilty by association. I've DMed Tuki before, but that doesn't make me a metagamer.

 

[Wraygun]

I've wanted to remain neutral on this, but I think I have to chime in here. I've not seen any evidence that would suggest or otherwise implicate you as actively sabotaging the community. You've actively provided me with help on Short Stories to a previous event.

There are claims as to you being involved in active community sabotage just because you are part of a Discord, but I've not seen anything concrete. I've not even seen you being banned, because there is nothing to go off, other than you falling together with a bunch of bad apples together.

I understand that management and moderation leads are frustrated with the whole ordeal. As anyone would be. But I urge management to look at this one more time - to reconsider, to judge things for what they are. Ryan has dedicated time and effort to the community, and I believe it's unbelievably unfair to not offer any sort of explanation as to why he was removed.

I want Ryan reinstated, he's a maelstrom of roleplay, and his efforts should not be tossed down the drain just because he was in some discord that he was invited to - and to my knowledge has never even interacted with I understand there is frustrations, I understand that there is distrust given what the Liberators have done - but Ryan isn't one of the people doing this. I ask one more time: reconsider Ryan's removal. Reconsider the verdict.

 

[Genny]

Hi! After being harrassed and targetted by these people you apparently got caught up with, I will now refute all your claims!

But first- Ryan, I understand you wish to explain your side. This response focuses solely on factual insonsistencies and evidence that contradict your claims.

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​

Here is my first refute to your claim! You claim that you had no involvement with this discord however! I bring this to the table, showing that you actively spoke and involved yourself with these people. Your presence alone contradicts your denial of awarness. You saw what these people were planning, hell you saw them target me and Eviction as well!

​

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Claim 2! You argue that your removal was due to a misunderstanding about Muho's props. Nope! They have coordinated OOCly to intereference with IC events *multiple* times. Sadly Muho's propping was one of these caught in their sights. Your framing of the issue as a prop dispute distracts from the documented metagaming, targeted harassment, and manipulation of faction structures.
​

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Third claim! You say you are innocent collateral damage? FUCK NO! You directly benefited from outcomes that these people orchestrated, including (BUT NOT LIMITED TO- LOL!):

• promotion to MCP Director after the removal of others targeted by that same circle.
• OOC coordination leading to IC assassinations and faction restructuring that advanced his position.
• Benefiting from misconduct undermines the argument of being collateral.

​

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FOURTH! yes ladies and gentlemen, we are still going. No evidence was presented to you? Uhm.. okay? Staff are
not obligated to disclose evidence to those under investigation if that evidence compromises others' privacy or ongoing moderation processes. The presence of multiple corroborating screenshots, logs, and testimonies meets the internal threshold for action.. as I have just shown the audience!

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ladies and gentlemen, we have a fifth reason! You've been apart of this community since 2020? Should that imply trust? FUCK NO. What about the others who did this disgusting shit? Who betrayed Rad? Even Cen! Longevity does not equate to immunity. Many of those involved also had long-standing records! You should know that integrity is measured by conduct, not tenure. But.. wait!? You do not even have integrity? Look below!

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or not idk anymore, sorry if you see the screenshot who sent it but we both know we dont want assholes like this playing the server.

Running a story? Really? Man, you're just as bad as these other people who got banned. First class manipulator here, ladies and gentlemen! No wonder you are a lawyer!​

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last but not least- and I am sooooooooo sorry but this is totally a shitpost, but I had too. I doubt anyone can blame me:

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You're innocent you say? Fuck no.

Your own words confrim association, awareness, and deliberate narrative control. You've been actively manipulating people to try and get back into this server! The removal was justified based on those factors and on corroborated evidence from within the metagaming network.

That's all from me, Willardians! Have fun looking at these lovely and intersting screenshots. There is so much more but where's the fun is laying everything on the table.

 

[Purple Knight]

Neonity was staff manager / HoS for a long time, served willard faithfully for a time before I banned her for crashing out after one of her Dutch friends was banned, so to corroborate with the above, longevity does not mean you're infallible

 

[Muho]

Ryan you knew everything happened, still didn't report. I collected evidence for a month.

Even if you are innocent as you claim, you were profiting from the Meta, were involved in it. Were a planned figure. I can't call you innocent IMO. Sorry

Destroying my props because you guys didn't like the infestation was the last straw for me ngl... never mess with my props!

 

[Lord Beckett]

Your own words confrim association, awareness, and deliberate narrative control. You've been actively manipulating people to try and get back into this server! The removal was justified based on those factors and on corroborated evidence from within the metagaming network.

That's all from me, Willardians! Have fun looking at these lovely and intersting screenshots. There is so much more but where's the fun is laying everything on the table.

Do you have any screenshots of him actually coordinating with them? From what I see here, it just seems like a bunch of vindictive people trying to force certain people out, and they're using Ryan as a means to an end. Clearly I don't have the full picture, but I don't see anything damning here. I know what Dispatch loves to say, but inaction doesn't always mean conspiracy... I mean, the literal CivPro lead was in the discord, so is it so hard to imagine he might've thought this was legitimate? That's his literal boss in the faction. I'd like to see some actual evidence of wrongdoing, please.

 

[Genny]

Do you have any screenshots of him actually coordinating with them? From what I see here, it just seems like a bunch of vindictive people trying to force certain people out, and they're using Ryan as a means to an end. Clearly I don't have the full picture, but I don't see anything damning here. I know what Dispatch loves to say, but inaction doesn't always mean conspiracy... I mean, the literal CivPro lead was in the discord, so is it so hard to imagine he might've thought this was legitimate? That's his literal boss in the faction. I'd like to see some actual evidence of wrongdoing, please.

​

brother are we for real? Your asking for proof that has been provided but I shall say it clearly for you.
1. Ryan was present in the metagaming discord
2. He acknowledged being OOCly connected with banned members.
3. He admitted to “running a story since my removal,” confirming a deliberate attempt to manage perception.
4. He benefited directly from outcomes orchestrated by that group, including promotions and faction restructuring tied to their actions.

What I just posted is evidence of involvement and gain. The argument that “inaction isn’t conspiracy” ignores the documented coordination that occurred in that server . Participation and benefit, not explicit instruction, meet the threshold for involvement.

I wouldn't comment anymore or you'll make a fool of yourself..

 

[Lord Beckett]

brother are we for real? Your asking for proof that has been provided but I shall say it clearly for you.​

1. Ryan was present in the metagaming discord
2. He acknowledged being OOCly connected with banned members.
3. He admitted to “running a story since my removal,” confirming a deliberate attempt to manage perception.
4. He benefited directly from outcomes orchestrated by that group, including promotions and faction restructuring tied to their actions.

What I just posted is evidence of involvement and gain. The argument that “inaction isn’t conspiracy” ignores the documented coordination that occurred in that server . Participation and benefit, not explicit instruction, meet the threshold for involvement.

I wouldn't comment anymore or you'll move a fool of yourself..

Again, you've failed to show me any actual evidence. Shitposting and calling me an idiot just proves you're as vindictive as the people you're condemning. Grow up.

 

[Muho]

Again, you've failed to show me any actual evidence. Shitposting and calling me an idiot just proves you're as vindictive as the people you're condemning. Grow up.

So being in a discord called "Shadow Government" isn't enough?

 

[TheGamingPlumber]

So being in a discord called "Shadow Government" isn't enough?

we got a shadow government before gta 6.....

 

[Mullet]

This thread does not constitute a complaint about the nature of the server, but rather amounts to complaints about specific individuals. As the purpose of this area on the forums is not to blame specific individuals, but instead is to make complaints about the server's functions, I'm not satisfied the criteria for posting here has been met and hence as a moderator have decided to move this thread to a private/public area for further discussion.

I would encourage individuals not within the staff team to refrain from posting on this thread, as whilst it is currently your right with this being a public thread, I don't believe any conversation here will be constructive.

This thread will be moved in two minutes.

 

[Lord Beckett]

So being in a discord called "Shadow Government" isn't enough?

I can see how upset you all are, but just looking at this from an unbiased point of view, I don't see enough evidence to give this guy the boot. And making fun of me/skull reacting me isn't going to stop me from speaking from a point of genuine honesty. I know HL2Rp isn't known for civil discussion, but try and make an attempt.

 

[RedHotGinger]

The level of metagaming these clowns were engaged in is embarrassing. Holy shit. There is something so utterly humiliating about that level of desperation.

 

[Mullet]

@Ryan GearPermer
Per my above, which includes reasoning, I've moved this thread to a better suited space, abuse complaints, which I believe best suits your intended purpose for this thread.

If you disagree with this decision you are welcome to address it with my superiors, the current moderation leads.

I'll remind you that, as an independent moderator, I am only viewing and judging based on what I see. The thread was serving no positive influence and was leading only to rage-bait, disrespectful words, and arguments. As such I will further be locking this thread as I don't believe it contains constructive lines of inquiry or conversion.

Thank you.

 

[Mullet]

Moderation team are free to add further.

 

[Imperator RAD-X]

Look. Ryan. I've got a lot to think about. I like you, I do. I don't think you're THE ENEMY. You made a decision to join a cheater discord and you're saying you got caught up in the mess. I just don't believe it, at least not right now. Not unless you can prove to everyone here and I literally mean *everybody* that you mean what you say.

For context to everyone, I'll make one thing clear...

I run this server.

It’s a long-standing project that has evolved through many versions, teams, and ideas. People change, settings change, and so does the community. That’s normal — it’s part of what keeps this Willard fucking alive at this point.

Let me be clear: evidence does not lie.
The decisions that Cengiz and Rabithunter didn't get made lightly or just "for the sake of it", nor without due process. I spent hours awake at late hours going through nooks and crannies given by Muho and it's just mindboggling.

At no point has there been any genuine accountability. No admission of wrongdoing, no apology. Instead, there’s been an attempt to shift blame onto those enforcing what we've got as our guidelines. Just "FUCK, I GOT CAUGHT! I NEED A NEW PLAN!"

When people choose to cheat, deceive, or manipulate in the scale that I've seen that's practically WORSE than what people blame Neonity etc for; the things that put Bottlestreet to shame, it leaves me with a lot of pause and a lot of seeing red.

For the record, yes I went into one of my famous rants I'm known for. Except the rant was nuclear and it was a lot of shouting. Anyway... Whether deliberate or not, actions taken and being involved have contributed to destabilizing my project, entirely. From where I sit on this chair, it feels less like coincidence and more like community sabotage and a literal server conspiracy that operated like a literal real CABAL calling itself "THE SHADOW GOVERNMENT". Ryan... intentional or otherwise, the effect is the same.

To be absolutely transparent: this isn’t personal. I’m not angry at you as an individual but I’m angry that, once again, we’ve had to confront the consequences of deception where there should have been trust. And it appears to be constant in this server for some weird, fucked up reason. You had opportunities to step back, to come clean and tell us this shit is happening and you chose - DEFACTO - not to. That’s the part that’s hardest to reconcile.

If you were truly innocent, your actions would have reflected that. But they didn’t. I don't care about props because I've had my event stuff removed which took me ages to make but I didn't go burning people down for it. Muho might have taken it personally (and he did) but he's not up on trial. This post represents the entirety of the group that got banned and scrutinised.

I'm tired of my trust being betrayed by my own team. This is the limit. In fact it went past the limit. It makes me want to literally exonerate people like Hayden who I now believe was falsely acclaimed as an evil being because it makes me look like a fucking dipshit for not doing so otherwise to which I now owe an apology.

And to the REST OF YOU that think that If you genuinely value what we're trying to do here, then DON'T give me that shit about "good roleplay means this person didn't do anything wrong" - Shut up. We've lost how many months of progress down to this shit, by now? KNOW BETTER.
I'm not dismissing this thread, it'll be kept here till I get to it at a time where things in the community have calmed down. But I have an iteration to close.

 

[Lab]

My input likely isn't wanted, but the degree of Ryan's association doesn't convict him of anything, at least what has been shown in this thread. The most "damning" screenshot out of those posted by Genny is Ryan being pinged about a funny clip and being asked how private he wants it? If you're going to implicate Ryan and justify this publicly, at least show something definitive, that proves he was active and knowingly involved in a metagaming conspiracy and not just invited into a random discord with his faction lead boss and pinged once (I'm willing to admit I'm wrong here, but this evidence has not been shown in the thread).

The anger felt by Rad and the staff team is justified, but clarity of mind is required as well. We should rise above the blunder of banning someone innocent because of association, and Ryan needs to be proved beyond a reasonable doubt that he was fully aware and/or actively engaged in what was going on, rather than simply being invited and joining absent-mindedly, and assuming the best intentions for the others involved (since his faction lead boss was there, as Beckett stated). Though in hindsight it seems obvious this group was malicious, I can understand if someone who is not active in the discord, did not see that at the time and thus doesn't take the initiative to report its wrongdoings.

I'm not seeing anything beyond a reasonable doubt here nor even anything malicious from Ryan.


1. Ryan was present in the metagaming discord
2. He acknowledged being OOCly connected with banned members.
3. He admitted to “running a story since my removal,” confirming a deliberate attempt to manage perception.
4. He benefited directly from outcomes orchestrated by that group, including promotions and faction restructuring tied to their actions.
-- Again, these are interesting, but still don't prove anything more than someone being at the wrong place, at the wrong time, and not having the sightline to understand that what is happening is wrong. Further investigation is required before slamming the ban button.


Be careful and clear: being in a Discord and 'benefiting', though interesting and deserving of further inquest, does not conclusively convict you of anything in itself. It indicts him, which is different to a conviction.

On temperament and motive:
Rad's comment directly above this rebukes the claim that 'good roleplay' proves Ryan's innocence. And though this can be the case, Ryan's roleplay and his participation and creation in large personal story arcs that don't involve CvR and are strictly character/relationship-focussed (I don't know anything about these arcs, I'm just going off what I've been told by others) points to a certain temperament and incentive that Ryan has playing on the server. Putting effort into these non-CvR storylines, bespeaks a concern for... roleplay. That puts Ryan in contrast to the rest of the banned conspirators for their overt predilections for CvR and S2K. Ryan is clearly an odd one out. His motives don't align with the others in the Discord, and that is worthy of consideration.

Most of the players that have been banned deserve it, and should remain banned. Emotions are running high and this degree of conspiratorial behaviour OOC'ly is poor form, but some care needs to be taken not to be overzealous in punishing those who weren't perpetrators.

1. Ryan was in the Discord with his faction lead boss, which is grounds enough to assume that what's going on is legitimate
2. Ryan didn't seem to be active in the Discord, the most damning screenshot provided here, about some silly clip that he was pinged for
3. Ryan's temperament, and motives for even being here, is in stark contrast with the CvR/S2K types that were active in the Discord

TLDR: Correlation does not equal conviction, and there are too many confounding factors and too much ambiguity in the "evidence" compared to the other involved players to warrant a ban for Ryan at this time.

PS: To the kind people who've told me there's a "full story" to this, thanks... but it SHOULD be put in this thread as well. Because the evidence in here is lacklustre.

 

[Genny]

You are not owed access to all private material evidence. The screenshots that were made public already establish Ryan’s presence, association, and attempts to shape narrative after removal. Additional material exists, but it contains sensitive context and involves individuals who came forward under confidentiality. Protecting those people takes priority over satisfying public curiosity.
The staff team and Rad reviewed that complete evidence set, which includes content that cannot be published without violating privacy agreements.

Moderation decisions are based on the full record, not the fragments shown here. People such as Cengiz are competent and know what they are doing, you're just insinutating that they aren't and basing everything off of what you are seeing within a thread where Ryan is trying to manipulate people to make himself seen innocent.

Your interpretation ignores that reality.

The argument that “we need more proof” misunderstands the process. This was not a casual accusation- it was the conclusion of an internal investigation reviewed by multiple leads.

The bar for removal was met. He wasn't even banned which illistrates that you do not even have a full grasp on the situation but also that he wasn't colluding explicitly and maliciously like others to an extent, but god damn- he is not innocent. THAT is what my arguement was. He can play Willard, he is just trying to save face.

You can disagree, but lack of personal access to classified evidence does not invalidate the findings. What you wrote is just a slap to the moderation teams face and especially Rad's.